A day in the life/Revised Expectations

1:30 am Wake up, feed Aubrey
2:00 am Back to bed
5:30 am Wake up, feed Aubrey, try to pray whilst doing so.
6:00 am Back to bed
9:00 am Wake up to vocal children; confused; realize that I overslept. Need to do four things at once, must prioritize. Fix milk for Johnny, bottle for Aubrey, eat a cracker smeared with peanut butter, drink a glass of water. Go into Johnny's room first (Aubrey's quiet). Johnny is standing naked in bed, diaper nowhere to be found, soaked mattress and a turd are to be found. Ugh.
9:10 am Adjust expectations, rearrange priorities. Johnny goes into the tub. Aubrey gets a bottle while I sit on the toilet and watch Johnny.
9:57 am Everyone is fed, diapered, I finish my breakfast and begin housework.
10:30 am Find Johnny putting dishes in toilet. Put Johnny in his room to play, realize filthy linens are still on bed. Stop housework to start laundry.
11:00 am Go into Johnny's room. Oops, I missed some turd. it is all over the floor. Johnny plays in his bed while I scrub the floor, following a trail of turds. Turd covered toys are deposited in bathroom. Johnny and I pick up toys and he goes down for a nap.
11:30 am Kitchen and living room are clean. Aubrey is ready to eat. Feed her, get laundry.
12:00 pm Tuan comes home for lunch. He fends for himself, while I read Valley of Vision, fold laundry and watch the rest of our Netflix.
1:45 pm Finish the bathroom, hallway, our bedroom, run the vacum, check Facebook.
2:00 pm My Grandmother, sister, nieces and nephew arrive! We play, go to the playground, watch a camp movie.
4:30 pm Guests depart, Johnny goes down for some quiet time; Aubrey sleeps. I lounge happily on bed and check e-mail, blogs, etc . . .
5:30 pm We all get up, get bottles/cups ready and head to supper
7:00 pm Home! Johnny and I read books together.
7:30 pm Johnny off to bed, Tuan and I watch online with Aubrey
10:21 pm I look at the time and wonder why I'm blogging when there is bed to be sought--oh, yes, Aubrey is due to eat NOW!
10: 25 pm Off to fix bottle.

God really gave a lot of grace today--I was somehow able to laugh through this mornings trail of turd.

7 Things . . .

Guitta tagged me to list seven random things about me. I've been ruminating over this for several days and must confess that it will be hard to avoid turning this into a confessional of my deepest, darkest secrets. Here goes!

1. My hair has too big an influence on my mood/day. For example: if my hair is dirty or looks oily, I cannot feel good no matter what I'm wearing or what happens. Conversely, if my hair is clean (and especially if it is rolled), I can wear the nastiest clothes and feel absolutely confidently good. I am also extremely fond of Pantene--their conditioner is the best! Oh, and I sleep with my hair wet--using a hair dryer does weird things to my hair.

2. On the subject of hair . . . I cannot touch anything associated with other people's hair/heads. It's just disgusting. I will never rub your scalp (who knows what beasties or ailments lurk beneath?), share my hairbrush, touch your glasses, and in most cases, I don't like to use other people's cell phones. Although that doesn't apply to Tuan, Johnny, and Aubrey, I am glad that Tuan keeps his hair short.

3. When I was little, I liked the number sixteen. My "horse" was named sixteen and I wanted to be sixteen.

4. Once, I almost lost my best friend in a fight over a fur stole. The friendship was saved, however, because I was in possession of a bag of manuscripts. Cryptic, yes?

5. In Comp II, I was so involved in writing my research paper on the Lindbergh kidnapping, that I wrote seven extra pages to satisfy myself. My professor, Mr. Wedgeworth, didn't count off for that, but he did stop reading/grading at page eight. I find personal satisfaction in going beyond what is required on tasks.

6. I don't drink milk out of solid cups or drink coffee made by other people, unless I am certain of the cleanliness of their pot. I also cannot stand dark sheets.

7. I have a lot of fears/paranoias, but I used to have this persistent worry that I was really insane/crazy and everyone around me was in a conspiracy to pretend that I was normal, so I wouldn't feel bad about being crazy. Which makes me sound crazy, but I'm not!

Okay, enough about me. I tag: Sonny, Christy, Mrs. Dorothy, and Beth

Excercises in Futility/AKA dying to self

Today has been the hardest "normal" day so far. It's not so much hard as just sort of a persistent excercise in futility.

In college, I paid my meager way by working as a janitress for a cleaning service who was contracted by our church's private school. Every day from 3:30 until I was done, I cleaned the bathrooms, offices, and glass doors of the Senior High and Elementary schools. Later on, I added dust-mopping and mopping to my repertoire. I got very good at completing my job quickly and well, but my goodness, talk about feeling futility in one's work! Every bright and shining bathroom just reminded me that in a matter of hours it would be used again and messed up again and some stupid teenage boy would leave his sandwich in the urinal--AGAIN. I still bear a grudge against two certain covenant boys who would go behind us and make messes on Wednesday nights. Oddly enough, I caught two of those same boys stealing a golf-cart at Against the Flow . . . and the sons of church officers, no less! But here, discretion is required and names shall not be mentioned.

Newborn days and nights remind me of those times. By the time the baby is fed, I'm bathed, things are picked up, Johnny is asleep, and sleep is possible, I just think, "why bother? She'll be ready to eat again in an hour . . ." There's always a toss-up between staying up and doing something, or going on to sleep in hopes that Aubrey will sleep longer and bonus sleep will be had.

Tuesday, I missed Aubrey's newborn appointment with our pediatrician by 40 + minutes. I didn't estimate the timing right, she was ready to eat when it was time to go . . . we had to reschedule. Today, I busted it to get ready and miraculously had time to get make-up on (first time since Christmas!) and we arrived at the doctors office early only to find out that the re-scheduled appointment was yesterday. Yep, yesterday. We have rescheduled for next Tuesday and the ungodly hour of 8:30 (it is an ungodly hour when you live thirty minutes away, and it takes at least an hour and a half to get everyone fed, ready, clean and in the car).

I was pretty embarrassed and humiliated at that. I hate being late with a passion and twice in one week was just humiliating. The aggravation of a morning of productivity lost didn't help either. The fact that gas was wasted on a fourth trip into town this week got at me. We returned home deflated but mostly over it. Johnny had not had a nap at the sitters which would normally be great, because as soon as Aubrey was fed and they were both down, I could grab a nap. Except company was supposed to arrive at one. I knew they'd be late, but as the minutes rolled by, and I got sleepier, I thought, "well, I'll catnap on the couch and wake up when they get here." The phone rang at two o'clock, with the news that said company was not coming until TOMORROW. Two naps in row wasted, lost, gone.

An overnight guest is supposed to arrive sometime this afternoon, Johnny is finally settled down (again--the camp radio was left on and Warner's voice just scared the living daylights out of us all). I'm contemplating trying once more to try and get a nap in, but Aubrey is already stirring. (Of course, she likes to pretend to wake up, drive me out of bed in a mad rush to get her food ready and avoid the wails, then whilst I'm in the kitchen staggering around she goes right back to sleep)

I'm not complaining--really. It's all rather humorous in a strange way. The house is clean, I actually feel great recovery-wise and have a lot of inspiration for projects. Anything lacking could be cured by a good nap and an iced tea, some quiet time in the Word and a hug from Tuan. I'm going to lie down right away and see if a nap can be got. If not, then a prayer for grace and a cup of tea will suffice. God is using this to make me more like Jesus and I'd take my troubles any day over those my sisters-in-Christ at home and abroad are going through. Finally, brethren, pray for us. (!)